For some reason tonight, I feel a little sad. I feel incredibly blessed and yet I feel just sad.
Two years ago, someone so dear to me was called home. I had a hard time with memories in February, but this weekend, I went to help celebrate her sweet boy's 7th birthday. We had our children together and grew in motherhood together and fretted and laughed over naps and bath time together. My boys and her boys were best buddies and she was my constant. Being around her boys this weekend and seeing a space she filled so brilliantly made me miss her so much. Those who knew her and loved her can understand when I say that words just don't exist to express how magnificent she was to us and the loss we feel without her in our lives.
I am also looking forward to my sister's little family embarking on their new adventure of living the career life. This brings on so many exciting things, one of them being, "where will we move?" She has filled a need in my life of familiarity, friendship, belonging, confidant, and validater. I'm terribly excited for her, but cannot help but feel small moments of anticipation for the loss and how I will miss her.
Tonight I'm allowing myself to be sad. I laid my head on my husband's shoulder and got it a little wet with some tears. He said, "It's ok to be sad." So, if anyone else needs to hear those words, here they are, I send them out to you.
1 comment:
I have also felt so sad about Suzanna these past few weeks, so I can only imagine how you feel. I don't know what I would do if I lost by best friend. I know how close you two were and I'm sure she misses you terribly as well. So soak up the sadness, you are definately entitled to it.
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